Neeley's Kindergarten Class
Neeley and Miss Thomas
We are moving from one first to the next. This year, Neeley was the first in our family to go to school. I loved seeing her experience Kindergarten but hated to see her go each day. I would drop her off at the curb and my heart would just ache every day as I saw her walk up to her line in front of her classroom. I thought it would get easier as the months went by, which it did some but never really all the way. I loved to watch her stop and talk to her friends along the way or see her run and play on the playground. Most mornings I would wait until the bell rang before driving away, just so I could get a glimpse of her new chapter in life. My intentions were never to helicopter around her, making sure she was ok, because I never worried about that. It was more of a longing to hold on to her a little longer. I guess I just have this feeling that it is a part of her life I am not the center of. A little part where she is just Neeley and not my daughter. In a way I am jealous or is it fearful. Fearful that she will not always be my little Neeley. And next year, well that will be another first. First grade. Don't even mention the fact she will be gone all day. Tears come to my eyes just thinking about her being gone from me more hours in the day than she is home.
Neeley, I am so proud of you. Proud of all A's (or 3's) on your report card. Proud of your good behavior in school and happy you can make friends easily. Thank you for being my 1st and being patient with all that comes with it.....even my tears! Maybe some day I'll be content to just drop you off and go, but for now, I'll watch you skip up to the door with your little pink backpack.
1 comment:
I sooo understand your feelings. When Austin started kindergarten, I had to come to peace with the idea that he was going to make friends with people I didn't hand pick for him. In a way, I was afraid for him to make that first step into such a harsh world.
Letting go gets easier, I think.
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